Everything You Want
by Ally-Cat2013
Summary: Ichigo has been trying to find a guy he truly wants to be with but has he already found them? And do they want him back?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Alright I know I have to update my other stories but this idea just came to me while watching a Bleach video. I just had to write it, or well, type it. This is named and based on one of my all time favorite songs. Please enjoy it.

Ichigo jumped as the phone rang. He had been watching a horror film marathon on TV all day and it startled him. Ironically right when the main character screamed bloody murder. A little more then irritated he grabbed the phone and answered. "Hello?"

"_Hey man_," his buddy Renji said on the other end. "_Whatcha doin_?"

"Nothin'. Watching TV, what about you?" he asked relaxing back in his seat. He grabbed some popcorn from the bowl in his lap and popped it into his mouth.

"_Same. Hey, how's it goin' between you and Shuuhei_?" Renji wondered.

Ichigo felt heat creep onto his face. "I don't know."

He knew Renji gave the phone a what-the-fuck look. _"You don't know? How can you not know? He's your boyfriend. Wait, he still is isn't he?"_

Ichigo sighed and scratched his head. "Yeah he's still my boyfriend but…"

"_But?"_

"I don't know. He's great and all but there just don't seem to be anything between us. I cant explain it."

"_It's ok man_," Renji told him. "_I know whatcha mean. Its like you're hanging with a buddy_."

"Yeah. Sorta like you and him," Ichigo said.

"_Oh that's gross. He's my cousin man_," Renji practically gagged.

Ichigo laughed. "All right, all right maybe not like that but you get what I was saying."

"_Yeah_," Renji sighed. _"So what are you gonna do about it?"_

"I have no clue," Ichigo said running a hand through his hair.

"_You have problems man_."

"Gee, thanks," Ichigo scowled.

Renji chuckled, "_Not like that- well, yeah, that way to. But what I meant is you are always having problems with guys. They're always great, amazing, nice, kind, blah blah blah. But there was no spark or feeling or whatever it is you want_."

"I know. Why is that when I come out of the closet I cant find any guys I like. It sucks ass," Ichigo complained.

"_I feel for ya man_," Renji sighed.

"What are you talkin about? You aint gay, and besides you and Rukia have been dating for like what? Two and a half years?"

"_Ok what are you talking about? Have you not seen that midget's Facebook status? She broke up with me this morning," _Renji told him.

"Seriously? What happened?" Ichigo asked him.

"_She complained about how I wasn't paying her enough attention and all that shit," _Renji answered him rolling his eyes.

"Damn, oh well. I kind of figured you two would end up separating soon."

"_Really? How?"_

"Well," Ichigo started, stretching his back, "You two have been fighting a lot. Every time we're hangin out you two are goin at it."

Renji sighed. "_Yeah, every time _you're_ around_."

"Are you hinting that it's my fault?" Ichigo asked.

"_Maybe_," Renji replied.

Ichigo scoffed. "Well that's total bullshit."

"_Oh really? How do you know?"_

"Two things. Rukia thinks I'm the biggest idiot in the world-well, second to you," Ichigo paused to laugh at the growl on the other end of the phone. "Plus, you ain't gay. Unless you're still in the closet. Are you? Do you prefer cheeto's over onion rings Renji?"

"_Yes Ichigo. I've been gay for a year now and madly in love with you_," Renji told him.

Ichigo laughed. "Yeah yeah very funny pineapple head."

"_I thought so too strawberry_."

Ichigo sighed, "But seriously man. What do I do about your cousin?"

Renji shrugged. "_Dump him. That's what you did with Grimmjow and Ulquiorra_."

"Ugh, I don't know. That seems a bit mean. We've only been together for a week. Maybe if I stay with him, some feelings will show," Ichigo reasoned.

"_Ichi, if feelings haven't shown by now then they're not gonna_," Renji told him.

"Yeah, you're probably right. I guess I haven't found the one yet," Ichigo sighed.

"_Hey, I was wonderin', what is the one to you?"_

"Since when do you care?"

"_I'm curious."_

Laughter bubbled up in Ichigo's throat. "You're curious?"

"_Not like that!" _Renji exclaimed.

Ichigo laughed. "All right. To me, the one would have to be someone I can get along with. He sort of has that bad ass personality, but is still laid back and can joke with me. Someone who can say the right thing at the right time. Who knows when I'm hiding. Someone who can give me what I need." 'Oh shit, I just basically described him. Please don't let him catch on.'

Renji was quiet while Ichigo talked, absorbing the information. 'Whoa, if I didn't know better, I'd say he was describing me.'

"Well, hey, it's getting late. I'm gonna go get some sleep. Later man," Ichigo said yawning.

"_Later," _Renji replied before hanging up.

Ichigo threw his phone on the couch before heading to his bedroom. He changed into his pajamas and laid down on his bed, listening to the TV in the back ground.

Soon he was asleep.

Ichigo yawned as he walked up the front steps of his school. At the top of the steps near the entrance was Renji, Shuuhei, Ikkaku, Yumichika, Rangiku, and Orihime.

"Hey Ichigo!" Orihime chirped as he neared them, alerting the others of his presence.

"Hey Orihime," he replied, yawning again.

"Did you not get enough sleep last night man?" Renji asked.

Ichigo scoffed, "No, my dad and my sisters got back from their trip at 2:00 am this morning and my dad woke me up to show me pictures he took and all that shit. I didn't get over two hours of sleep."

"Damn, you think you can manage to stay awake during class?" Shuuhei asked wrapping his arm around Ichigo's waist.

Shrugging, Ichigo laid his head on Shuuhei's shoulder and answered, "I guess we'll find out."

"Here," Yumichika said holding out his cup of coffee. "The way you're acting is very unbeautiful."

Ichigo rolled his eyes but took the coffee. He knew Yumichika drank his coffee like Ichigo, black. "Thanks," he muttered, bringing the cup to his lips. He relished the feeling of the hot liquid washed down his throat. Ichigo felt some of his drowsiness leave him. He sighed. "Thanks Yumichika."

Yumichika just shrugged before him and Ikkaku walked into the school.

"Hey Ichigo, you going to Renji's concert this weekend?" Rangiku asked.

"What concert?" Ichigo asked.

Rangiku looked at Renji, "You didn't tell him?"

"I forgot," Renji said shrugging.

"Forgot? How can you forget to tell your best friend something this big?" Rangiku asked in disbelief..

Renji just shrugged. "I dunno."

"Will someone please explain?" Ichigo interrupted.

"Renji's band got a club near by to let them play Saturday night," Shuuhei told him.

Ichigo turned his wide eyes to Renji. "How could you not tell me this?"

Renji shrugged. Again. "Forgot."

"Forgot? Forgot my ass, I swear you have CRS."

They looked at him confused so he explained. "It means Can't Remember Shit. CRS."

"Oh," Renji said then glared. "Hey!"

"It's true."

"He is right," Orihime agreed.

Shuuhei and Rangiku nodded.

"Ya'll are all ganging up on me today," Renji grumbled as they laughed. Finally the bell rang, signaling them to get to class.

"See ya guys," Ichigo told 'em as him and Renji walked to the same class.

"See ya."

"Later."

It was only half an hour into the school day and Ichigo already felt like he was gonna drop dead. He had his head propped up on his hand but he could feel it slide down every now and then while his eyes start to flutter close. Renji who sat next to him saw what was happening. Quickly he scribbled down a note and tossed it to the strawberry while the teacher wasn't looking.

Ichigo looked down at the note before opening it and reading what it said.

Dude, go splash some water on your face or something before you get your ass in trouble.

He looked over at the redhead and nodded. He raised his hand and got the pass from the teacher. Slowly he made his way to the boys restroom. Cursing how coffee failed him he turned on the cold water and cupped some into his hands. The water froze his skin and woke his senses up. Grabbing some paper towel he wiped most of it off as someone walked through the door. He threw the paper towel away and was about to walk out when he bumped into the person. Looking up he was about to apologize when he saw who it was.

"Grimmjow," he scowled.

"Hey there Ichi," Grimmjow practically purred with a smirk.

With his infamous scowl Ichigo tried to walk around the blue haired boy but he was stopped by arms wrapping around his waist.

"Grimmjow, let me go," Ichigo told him.

"I don't think I will. Ya know, I wasn't to happy when you dumped me a month ago," Grimmjow said in Ichigo's hair.

"Too bad."

"Oh don't be like that. We had some pretty fun times when we were together," Grimmjow purred while sliding his hand under Ichigo's shirt.

Having enough of this harassment Ichigo pulled at Grimmjow's arms trying to pry them off. It was no use, he wasn't as strong.

Grimmjow pushed Ichigo up against the wall and started to nuzzle Ichigo's neck while unbuttoning his shirt.

Ichigo struggled as much as he could with Grimmjow's body pressed against his. "Grimmjow get off!"

Smirking, Grimmjow decided Ichigo was being too loud. He silenced him with a harsh kiss.

Ichigo was about to try to knee him where it would truly hurt when he was suddenly free. He looked up to see Shuuhei and Renji standing over a knocked Grimmjow. Ichigo guessed Shuuhei had hit him with the block that said hall pass on it. Stepping over Grimmjow, Ichigo wrapped his arms around Shuuhei's waist, smiling when he felt Shuuhei's wrap around his shoulder's.

"You ok? He didn't hurt you did he?" Shuuhei asked, stroking Ichigo's spiky hair.

"No, he didn't hurt me. I'm alright," Ichigo assured him.

"Good thing we came when we did," Renji muttered.

"Yeah, not that I'm complaining but what are you guys doing here?" Ichigo wondered.

"The teacher sent me to come get ya cause you were taking to long," Renji started.

"And I was on my way to the office when I bumped into Renji and decided to walk with him," Shuuhei finished.

Ichigo nodded then asked, "What are we gonna do with him?" pointing at Grimmjow.

"Leave him," Renji answered before walking out, the other two following him.

Shuuhei walked with Ichigo and Renji back to their class before walkin back to his own class.

Finally after many hours, classes, one uneventful lunch, and walks down the long hallways the school day was over and everyone left the hell hole called school. Ichigo walked with Shuuhei, Renji, and Shinji to a near by café. They all got a drink and sat down at one of the tables by the window.

"Hey Shinji, where were you this morning?" Renji asked the blond.

"Hanging with Nnoitra," Shinji answered off-handily.

Ichigo smirked. "Since when do you come back limping from just 'hanging'?"

Shinji glared at him without answering.

"Shinji, you dare try lying to me?" Renji said in mock offense/hurt.

Shinji punched him in the arm. "Shut up. And technically I didn't lie. I was with Nnoitra, I just didn't go into details about what we were doing."

"Whatever," Renji chuckled.

"So anyway, I heard you guys were playing Saturday at Soul Society. How did that happen?" Shinji asked him.

"Isane knows someone who works their and was able to get us in."

Shinji nodded.

_I know some things that you don't_

_I've done things that you won't_

_There's nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home-_

Ichigo answered his phone. "Hello?"

"_ICHIGO! My beautiful son! How was your-"_

Before his dad could finish his sentence Ichigo had already hung up.

Seeing his irritation Shuuhei placed his hand on his shoulder, "You ok?"

Ichigo nodded. "That was my dad."

They all nodded in understanding having met the crazy man at least once.

"You know what he wanted?" Renji asked.

"Nope."

Soon they were all discussing random topics ranging from school to sports.

Ichigo listened to Renji laugh at a joke Shinji told them 'He has such a nice laugh.' He has had a crush on Renji for as long as he could remember. The reason he never felt a spark with a guy is because he already felt the spark when ever Renji was near. Lost in his thoughts he didn't hear what they were saying when he suddenly felt a searing pain in his head; it felt like someone cut the inside of his scalp with a dull, jagged knife then started beating the cuts with a salt covered meat cleaver. Squeezing his eyes shut he grabbed his head and leaned forward. A nauseas feeling crept up in his stomach.

"Ichigo?" Renji called. The were all watching Ichigo, worry covered their faces.

Shuuhei started to rub Ichigo's back, hoping it would comfort him.

After a few minutes the pain eased away and he sighed in relief before looking up at his friends.

"You have another headache?" Shuuhei asked him still rubbing his back.

"Yeah, but don't worry. I'm fine," Ichigo tried to assure them but it was not working.

"Ichi, you need to go to the doctor. This is the seventh time it has happened this week," Renji told him.

"It's nothing Renji," Ichigo argued.

"No it aint. If your to stubborn to go to the doctor on your own then I will drag you there myself," Renji argued back.

"Renji-"

"Don't even try to get out of it Ichigo. I'm taking you Sunday and that's it," Renji said in a this-conversation-is-over tone of voice.

Ichigo sighed knowing he had lost. Looking at his boyfriend he saw he was trying not to laugh; same as Shinji. "What's so funny?"

"You two argue like a married couple that's what," Shinji answered him with a wide grin.

"Shut up," Ichigo muttered.

"You asked."

"Well, as fun as this has been I gotta go," Shuuhei suddenly said standing up.

"Alright," Ichigo told him.

"We still on for tomorrow night?" he asked as he pulled his jacket on.

"Tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, remember, we said we were gonna go see a movie," Shuuhei explained.

"Oh, right. Yeah, sorry I forgot. But yeah, we're still on," Ichigo sighed.

Shuuhei gave him a concerned look. Trying to reassure him Ichigo pulled on his shirt bringing him down for a chaste kiss. It worked.

"Bye guys," Shuuhei called as he walked away.

"Bye."

Not long after he left they all soon started to walk away. Ichigo made his way to his house, opening the door automatically ducking, dodging his father attack.

Ignoring his dads shouts of praise he went up to his room; not going down until it was time for supper.

A/N: Well what did you think? And if you're waitin for me to update my other stories then don't worry, I plan to update within a week or two. Anyway please review! It makes me happy and want to update faster. Ja ne!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: heads up there is a moment of major yaoi ahead. Enjoy!

Today was Friday and nothing happened at all. No weird moments, no fights, nothing. Ichigo wondered what was going on when he walked into his bedroom. Dropping his bag by his door he saw Renji flipping thru a magazine on his bed.

"Hey Renji, what are you doing here?" he asked him.

Renji looked up. "Waitin for you, what else?"

"Why?"

Renji shrugged. "Had nothing else to do." He laid back against the pillows and pull his hair tie out. Ichigo stared at his long red hair that covered half his face. "Damn thing keeps coming loose," Renji muttered throwing the tie in the trash.

Ichigo just sat down at his desk and stared at his screensaver scrolled across his laptop. He wouldn't look over at Renji cause he knew he was blushing.

Renji noticed and wondered what was going through Ichigo's head. He just ignored it. "Hey Ichigo, can you turn the air conditioner on or something? Its hot in here."

"Can't. It broke last week and we haven't gotten it fixed yet."

Renji sighed. "Oh well." he began to unbutton his shirt.

"W-what are you doing?" Ichigo stuttered.

"I told you its hot in here. I gotta cool off somehow," Renji explained tossing his shirt on the floor.

Ichigo knew his face was completely red by now and tried to calm down. But the site of Renji laying shirtless with his hair down on his bed was making it hard to breathe. His pants were becoming a little uncomfortable.

"You ok Ichi?" Renji asked, unknowingly sending shivers down Ichigo's spine.

"Y-yeah, I'm f-fine," Ichigo told him. He looked down at the top of his desk.

Renji stared at him oddly for a few minutes before he understood what was going on. With a smirk he quietly got off the bed and stood behind Ichigo. Leaning down he whispered against Ichigo's ear. "You sure about that?" He chuckled when Ichigo jumped in surprise. "You seem a bit flustered and jumpy, _Ichi_," he purred before licking the shell of his ear.

"R-Renji?" Ichigo said wondering what was happening.

"Hmm?" Renji placed his hands on the desk, trapping Ichigo where he was.

Ichigo didn't know what was going on. His best friend, his best **straight** friend, who he was in love with was starting to molest him. He wasn't complaining, just confused. He turned around in his chair to ask him what he was doing when Renji suddenly fused their lips together. Startled, he stood up, knocking his chair over. Renji moved with him, keeping their lips together and pressing their bodies close. Ichigo brought his hands up to Renji's shoulders to push him away, but his body had a mind of its own as he started to kiss back and run his fingers through the long red hair.

He moaned as Renji shoved his tongue into his mouth while groping his ass. The tightening in his pants began to ache as he grinded against Renji's hardness. In a flurry of kisses and movement, Ichigo was on his desk, clutching Renji tightly as his prostate was struck relentlessly by Renji's dick. He moaned loudly as Renji grabbed his erection, pumping it in time with his thrusts.

"Ah! Oh god, Renji!" He practically screamed.

"Damn Ichigo, I love-ah-you," Renji grunted as he picked up his speed.

Unable to speak, Ichigo pulled him into a passionate kiss, moaning wantonly. He was so close to coming undone. Renji broke the kiss and whispered huskily in his ear, " That's it baby, cum for me."

_BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP_

Ichigo bolted up in his bed panting. A familiar ache pulsed between his legs as he turned off his alarm clock. "Damn it," he muttered. Judging from the sounds behind his door, he knew his family was awake so he couldn't just go take a cold shower. Having no other choice, he pulled back his covers and pulled down his boxers. There standing proudly was member. Laying back down he put a pillow over his face and grabbed his erection. Moaning softly he began to run his hand up and down.

Precum leaked from the tip. Tightening his grip he picked up speed. Imagining it was Renji's large, rough hand he went faster. Moaning Renji's name he came in his hand. Grabbing tissues from his desk he cleaned up his mess and pulled his boxers back up.

He got dressed and walked downstairs. His family were all doing different things. Saturday was the only day they got free from work and school. Sunday doesn't count since it goes by so fast.

Grabbing a piece of toast he walked out the door and down the street. He promised Renji he would help him get ready for the show tonight. He still had a couple of hours till he needed to be there but he knew Renji wouldn't care. With his toast hanging from his mouth he walked around the corner and up Renji's driveway. He went up to the door and knocked several times. He heard footsteps, a small crash, cursing, and then the door finally opening revealing a pajama pant clad Renji holding his shin. His hair was up in a ponytail yet strands fell down in his face. He looked up at a grinning Ichigo. "What are you smiling about?"

Ichigo pulled the toast out of his mouth before saying, "The idiot who cant even open a door without hurting himself."

"Yeah yeah, just get your ass in here," Renji grumbled.

Ichigo chuckled before walking in and flopping down on the couch.

Renji sat down in the large recliner beside the couch looking like he was about to fall asleep. "So what are you doing here this early?"

"I accidentally turned my alarm on last night so it woke me up almost an hour ago and I had nothing better to do," Ichigo answered.

"Gee, make me feel special.'

Ichigo laughed. "Whatever. What did you want my help with?"

"Getting an outfit for tonight."

"Why don't you just wear something you already have? You have some cool clothes."

Renji shifted in his seat as his cheeks were tinted pink. "I uh, I'm gonna sing a special song tonight."

Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "Special song?"

Renji nodded. "Yeah. A song I wrote for someone."

"A love song?"

Jumping up Renji scratched the back of his head and told him, "You'll have to wait and see."

Letting it go Ichigo changed the topic. "Well whenever you're ready to go let me know."

"Alright, I'll go get dressed." And with that Renji was gone.

"Renji, for the love of god pick something!"

Renji and Ichigo had been shopping for three hours, searching for the perfect outfit. But they haven't found shit.

"I can't. None of this is what I need."

"What do you need?" Ichigo asked him.

"Something that makes me look bad ass, sexy, all around awesome," he explained looking through some t-shirts.

"Well why am I here again?"

"Because your gay and actually have a really good sense of style. Most of the clothes I have that are cool you bought or picked out for me," Renji told him.

"True. But I doubt I'll find anything for you before I will kill you from frustration."

Renji rolled his eyes. "Well I'm sorry but I need tonight to be…"

"Perfect?" Ichigo offered.

"Yeah, absolutely perfect," Renji said in a low voice.

Ichigo sighed. "Alright then. Here's what we will do. You walk outside of the store. I'll pick out the outfit and will give it to you to try on. It will be much faster. Now leave."

Renji did as told and walked outside of the store and sat in the cushiony chairs they had in the mall.

Twenty minutes later Ichigo txted Renji telling him to come back in. He made his way to the back where they had the dressing rooms. Ichigo was leaning against the wall.

"It's all in there. Put it all on," Ichigo told him while shoving him into the small room.

When Renji came out Ichigo almost started drooling. Renji was wearing a long sleeve, white shirt that had black and red graffiti writing and was tight enough to show the outline of every single muscle, black jeans that were ripped in different places and that hugged the top of his thighs and ass, and to top it off a black leather jacket that wasn't too tight or too loose and had red covering his shoulder and arms with a red Chinese dragon on the back. Thin and thick black and silver bracelets covered his wrist while a medium size chain hung around his neck.

Ichigo realized he was staring longer than he should and shook his head. "You look amazing," he finally told Renji, looking up into his eyes.

"Really?" Renji asked. He seemed to really be nervous.

"Yeah, really. And it would look even better with those biker boots I bought you for your birthday so you don't need to get any shoes."

"Alright, let me change back into my clothes then."

"K, I'll be waiting by the register."

A few minutes later they were leaving the store with Renji's new outfit.

"Hey Ichi," Renji suddenly said digging around in his bag, "I got ya something." Finally he pulled out a necklace. It was a long chain that had a black and white sword pendant on it that was shaped like a cooking knife. On the black part of the pendant it had in silver 'Zangetsu'.

Ichigo gasped and carefully took it into his hands. "Wha…"

"I saw you staring at it while we were in line and grabbed it for ya when you weren't looking. I made sure you didn't see it cause I knew you would say-"

"You didn't have to buy me this," Ichigo interrupted holding the necklace out for Renji to take.

"I know I didn't have to but I wanted to. As a way to say thanks for coming with me and helping me. And if you don't accept it I will be highly offended," Renji told him, knowing Ichigo wouldn't argue with him.

Ichigo huffed, "Fine, I accept it. Thank you."

Renji smiled, "No problem. Now lets see it on ya." He took it out of Ichigo's hands and slid it over his head.

Ichigo looked down at the necklace that rested around his neck and against his chest smiling; he will always wear it.

"C'mon, lets go get something to eat," Renji said walking towards the food court. Ichigo followed, still smiling.

"Renji for all that is good and right in this world sit your ass down and relax!" Toshiro yelled.

"I can't! This is big. Our first actual concert where people will be watching us. People we don't even know," Renji told him. He has been pacing for about an hour now and they had to leave in a few minutes.

The whole band was waiting at Toshiro's house since they always practiced there and all the instruments were there. Everyone was looking over the notes they had to play and going through the rough parts. Renji had stopped singing with them since they all knew he knew the lyrics since he wrote them.

"Renji, everything will be fine. Why are you getting so worked up?" Nel asked him.

"Probably cause he has a special song for someone," Ichigo piped in.

"You're still freaking over that? Relax, it will be fine and go perfectly," Nel tried to reassure him.

Renji bit his lip nervously and pulled Nel out of the room. "I can't do this," he told her once he knew the others couldn't hear.

"Yes you can Renji. You've practiced this song so many times-"

"I'm not talking about the song!" Renji interrupted her. "I'm talking about what comes after the song!" He ran a hand through his ponytail and sat down against the wall. "It'll probably just ruin our friendship."

Nel kneeled down beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "It won't ruin anything. If I know anything about Ichigo, which I do, it will only pull you two closer. Very close if ya know what I mean."

Renji leaned his head back and sighed. Finally he spoke. "I'm not doing it."

Nel gasped. "But Renji-"

Renji stood up and cut her off. "I'll do the show but tell the others we aren't doing the last song. I'm gonna go for a drive. I'll meet ya at the club." And with that he walked out of the room and the house, leaving everyone confused.

Nel walked back into the room where the others were and explained. "He wont sing the song. The plan is off. He'll sing the other songs but not the last one."

"Are you kidding me? He freaks over this song and works so hard on it just to ditch it? Idiot," Toshiro grumbled.

"Where is he?" Ichigo asked her.

"I don't know, he said he would meet us at the club."

Ichigo sighed. "I'm gonna go ahead to the club and talk to him when he gets there," he told them grabbing his keys and walked out to his car.

Pulling onto the road he cursed Renji in his head. He does what he can to make everything perfect only to throw it all away. What the hell? He even made Ichigo wait three hours before finally getting an outfit. Not that Ichigo minded in the end since he got to see Renji in such a bad ass outfit but still. It's the principle of the thing. He started to fiddle with his necklace, something that has become a habit since he got it.

He parked his car in the grocery store parking lot that was across the street from the club. He walked in and to the back room they allowed the band to get ready in. There, on the couch, was the redhead.

"What the hell are you thinking?" Ichigo shouted.

Renji's head snapped to him. Surprised he started to stutter, "W-what are y-you-"

"You get us all worked up for this special song, special moment, and then just say screw it? No, you are going to sing that song," Ichigo demanded.

"Ichigo, you don't understand. I can't-"

"Can't what? You always do this Renji. You make this big plan and then just act like the whole thing was a waste of time. You're not doing this now. For once, stop being chicken shit and just go for it! Do what you planned to do with no backing down. If you try to do this again I will personally kick your ass, do you understand?"

Renji stared wide-eyed at Ichigo. He truly wanted him to do this? Realizing Ichigo wasn't kidding about kicking his ass Renji sighed. "Alright, I'll do it. But if this ends up ruining anything I blame you."

Ichigo smirked. "Fine, with me."

_I know some things that you don'tI've done things that you won-_

"_Hello?" Ichigo asked into his phone._

_Renji looked around the room as Ichigo talked to whoever was on the other end of the phone._

"_What?" Ichigo shouted into his phone, drawing Renji's attention. "You told him you would come, he's already had one freak-out moment…. What is more important?…. You have got to be kidding me…. Whatever, I gotta go." Ichigo hung up, irritation was almost tangible around him._

"_Hey, you ok?" Renji asked him._

_Ichigo looked at him and sighed, "Yeah, it's just that Shuuhei isn't coming."_

_Renji frowned. "What?"_

"_He said he was gonna spend the night with Izuru since Gin just dumped him."_

_Renji felt angry at that. He knew Shuuhei and Izuru had a thing for each other. Them in the same room for a whole night could only mean trouble. But then again, it's probably best that Shuuhei wasn't there._

_Running a hand over his face, Renji released a deep breath and said, "Alright. If he wont be here, fine."_

"_You sure you're ok with this?" Ichigo asked him cautiously._

_Renji nodded. "Yeah, I can deal with this."_

"_Ok."_

_It was now 7:00. The whole band was now setting up on the small stage the club had set up. Ichigo had gone down into the crowd to see the performance. He was right in the middle where Renji could easily spot him with his orange hair. While Renji and Nel finished up tuning their guitars a man with long white hair came onto the stage. He looked like he could be Toshiro's dad. He walked up to the microphone._

"_Alright, we have a new band here. They're amazing performers so please welcome, Bankai!"_

_The audience cheered as the spotlight came on._

_Renji looked nervously out onto the crowd. So many people were staring at him. He almost lost his nerve when his eyes attached to warm chocolate brown eyes. Ichigo gave him an encouraging smile which Renji returned before grabbing onto the mic. "Hey guys, we are Bankai and this first song is called Hero."_


	3. Chapter 3

Bankai had played about five sings before they took a break. Meeting Ichigo at the bar they ordered drinks. Many people separated themselves from the crowd to comment how good they were. One particular girl that Ichigo now hated went up to Renji and gave him her number.

"Sorry but I already have someone special," Renji tried to explain to her.

"They don't have to know," she flirted.

Ichigo narrowed his eyes. He was about to say something when he realized something that made him almost choke on his drink. Chuckling, he told 'her', "Sorry dude, he aint gay."

Renji looked at Ichigo confused before looking closely at the feminine man. His eyes widened comically.

The man shrugged, "I can change him." He grabbed the napkin with his number and put into Renji's jacket pocket and pecked Renji on the lips surprising all of them. "The name's Luppi sexy, call me." With that he left.

Renji snatched one of the napkins on the bar and wiped his mouth off roughly. "That was way creepy."

The others laughed at the redhead. Still chuckling Ichigo said, "Yeah really," and handed him his beer.

Gratefully Renji took it and chugged the rest of the bottle. Sighing he set the now empty bottle on the table.

Ichigo looked at him concerned. "You ok?"

Renji turned his head slightly to look at him. "Yeah, just nervous."

Ichigo nodded in understanding.

Looking at his watch Toshiro spoke up. "Come on guys, breaks over."

They nodded and followed the white-haired boy up onto the stage. Seeing they were back the crowd cheered. Ichigo happily yelling with everyone else. Feeling a gaze on him he turned his head to see the Luppi guy glaring at him before walking up to him.

"If I can't have him, neither can you," he said, venom dropping from his words.

Ichigo glared at the small brunette. Turning back to the stage he ignored him and focused on Renji.

"Alright, this song is called Whispers in the Dark," Renji said into the mic before music flooded the speakers and Renji started singing.

_Despite the lies that you're making_

_Your love is mine for the taking_

_My love is just waiting_

_To turn your tears to roses_

The music grew louder.

_Despite the lies that you're making_

_Your love is mine for the taking_

_My love is just waiting_

_To turn your tears to roses_

_I will be the one that's gonna hold you_

_I will be the one that you run to_

_My love is a burning, consuming fire_

_No, you'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes_

_ I'll light the night with stars_

_Hear my whispers in the dark_

_No, you'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes you know_

_ I'm never farHear the whispers in the dark_

_Whispers in the dark_

_You feel so lonely and ragged_

_You lay there broken and naked_

_My love is just waiting_

_To clothe you in crimson roses_

Beside Ichigo, Luppi sighed and placed a hand on his heart as if Renji were singing to him. Ichigo tried very hard not to strangle him then and there.

_I will be the one that's gonna find you_

_I will be the one that's gonna guide you_

_My love is a burning, consuming fire_

_No, you'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes_

_ I'll light the night with stars_

_Hear my whispers in the dar__k_

_No, you'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes you know I'm never far_

_Hear the whispers in the dark_

_No, you'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes _

_I'll light the night with stars_

_Hear the whispers in the dark_

_No, you'll never be alone_

_When darkness comes you know I'm never fa__r_

_Hear the whispers in the dark_

_Whispers in the dark_

_Whispers in the dark_

_Whispers in the dark _

The crowed cheered and anticipated the next song.

"This song is Monster, one of my personal favorites."

Renji started playing his guitar, then Toshiro on the drums and Nel with her guitar joined him. Isane soon joined when Renji started singing.

_The secret side of me, I never let you see_

_I keep it caged but I can't control it_

_So stay away from me, the beast is ugly_

_I feel the rage and I just can't hold it_

Since this was also one of Ichigo's favorites he sang along with the words. Luppi glared at him.

_It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls_

_It comes awake and I can't control it_

_Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head_

_Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?_

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monster_

_My secret side I keep hid under lock and key_

_I keep it caged but I can't control it_

_'Cause if I let him out he'll tear me up, break me down_

_Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?_

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_

_I must confess that I feel like a monste__r_

_I, I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monster_

_It's hiding in the dark, it's teeth are razor sharp_

_There's no escape for me, it wants my soul, it wants my heart_

_No one can hear me scream, maybe it's just a dream_

_Maybe it's inside of me, stop this monster_

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

Ichigo felt a shiver run down his spine when they altered Renji's voice.

_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I've gotta lose control, he something radical_

_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monste__r_

_I, I feel like a monster_

_I, I feel like a monster_

"Alright, well we got a few more songs to play then that's it." The whole crowd groaned and some shouted 'no!' Ichigo laughed and saw Renji grin. "I'm sorry but it's true. This next song is Never Surrender."

_Do you know what it's like when_

_You're scared to see yourself?_

_Do you know what it's like when_

_You wish you were someone else_

_Who didn't need your help to get by?_

_Do you know what it's like_

_To wanna surrender?_

_I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow_

_I don't wanna live like this today_

_Make me feel better, I wanna feel better_

_Stay with me here now and never surrender_

_Never surrender_

_Do you know what it's like when_

_You're not who you wanna be?_

_Do you know what it's like to_

_Be your own worst enemy_

_Who sees the things in me I can't hide?_

Ever time Ichigo heard this song he wanted to say he understood, that if Renji would let him he wouldn't surrender, would make him feel better. But, knowing he couldn't Ichigo stayed quiet. This song always upset him a little.

_Do you know what it's like_

_To wanna surrender?_

_I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow_

_I don't wanna live like this today_

_Make me feel better, I wanna feel better_

_Stay with me here now and never surrender_

_Make me feel better, you make me feel better_

_You make me feel better, put me back together_

_I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow_

_I don't wanna live like this today_

_Make me feel better, I need to feel better_

_Stay with me here now and never surrender_

_Put me back together_

_Never surrender, make me feel better_

_You make me feel better_

_Stay with me here now and never surrender_

"Well, since ya'll have been such an awesome crowd we're gonna play some new songs for you," Renji paused as the crowd shouted in appreciation. "This song is called One Day Too Late."

_Tick tock, hear the clock countdown_

_Wish the minute hand could be rewound_

_So much to do and so much I need to say_

_Will tomorrow be too late?_

_Feel the moment slip into the past_

_Like sand through an hourglass_

_In the madness, I guess, I just forget_

_To do all the things I said_

_Time passes by, never thought I'd wind up_

_One step behind, now I've made my mind up_

_Today, I'm gonna try a little harder_

_Gonna make every minute last longer_

_Gonna learn to forgive and forget_

_'Cause we don't have long, gonna make the most of it_

_Today, I'm gonna love my enemies_

_Reach out to somebody who needs me_

_Make a change, make the world a better place_

_'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late_

_One day too late, one day too late_

Ichigo frowned as he thought of how true this song is. Will he be too late to tell Renji? Biting his lip he tried to squash those thoughts.

_Tick tock, hear my life pass by_

_I can't erase and I can't rewind_

_Of all the things I regret the most I do_

_Wish I'd spent more time with you_

_Here's my chance for a new beginning_

_I saved the best for a better ending_

_In the end I'll make it up to you_

_You'll see, you'll get the very best of me_

_Time passes by, never thought I'd wind up_

_One step behind, now I've made my mind up_

_Today, I'm gonna try a little harder_

_Gonna make every minute last longer_

_Gonna learn to forgive and forget_

_'Cause we don't have long, gonna make the most of it_

_Today, I'm gonna love my enemies_

_Reach out to somebody who needs me_

_Make a change, make the world a better place_

_'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late_

_Your time is running out_

_You're never gonna get it back_

_So make the most of every moment_

_Stop saving the best for last_

_Today, I'm gonna try a little harder_

_Gonna make every minute last longer_

_Gonna learn to forgive and forget_

_'Cause we don't have long, gonna make the most of it_

_Today, I'm gonna love my enemies_

_Reach out to somebody who needs me_

_Make a change, make the world a better place_

_'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late_

_One day too late, one day too late_

_ One day too late, one day too late_

Renji, now totally nervous, grabbed the mic with both hands. "Alright well, this song will be our last and it's a bit different from the other songs we played tonight. The song we just played made me think of this one and how I've been chicken shit lately. I wrote this song to send a message to someone special tonight. They're here and I hope they understand what I'm trying to say. I've been waiting too long."

Ichigo frowned, as far as he knew only he was here beside the band that Renji knew, everyone else was busy. Was the message for him? That's probably too much to ask for.

With a slight sad frown he listened to the band, a tune that he wasn't used to hearing from them leaking from the speakers.

Carefully he listened to the words Renji sang.

_It's already coming in_

_Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind_

_You never could get it_

_Unless you were fed i__t_

_Now you're here and you don't know why_

_ But under skinned knees and the skid marks_

_Past the places where you used to learn_

_You howl and listenListen and wait for the_

_Echoes of angels who won't return_

_He's everything you want_

_He's everything you need_

_He's everything inside of you_

_That you wish you could be_

_He says all the right things_

_At exactly the right time_

_But he means nothing to you_

_And you don't know why_

_ You're waiting for someone_

_To put you together_

_You're waiting for someone to push you away_

_There's always another wound to discover_

_There's always something more you wish he'd say _

By now Ichigo knew the song was for him. Why Renji is singing this and what it has to do with him he had no idea. None of this click. The song is talking about his screwed up relationships wasn't it?

_But you'll just sit tight_

_And watch it unwind_

_It's only what you're asking for_

_And you'll be just fine_

_With all of your time_

_It's only what you're waiting for_

_ Out of the islandInto the highway_

_Past the places where you might have turned_

_You never did notice_

_But you still hide away_

_The anger of angels who won't return _

_He's everything you want_

_He's everything you need_

_He's everything inside of you_

_That you wish you could be_

_He says all the right things_

_At exactly the right time_

_But he means nothing to you_

_And you don't know why _

_I am everything you want_

_I am everything you need_

_I am everything inside of you_

_That you wish you could be_

_I say all the right things_

_At exactly the right time_

_But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why_

_And I don't know why_

_Why_

_I don't know _

Ichigo by now was wide-eyed and frozen in shock. Did Renji just basically say…what he thought he said? No, this made no sense. He's straight and he, he…. Ichigo pushed through the crowd making his way to the small room. On the way he saw Nel smile at him while walking away with Toshiro and Isane. They knew? Determined Ichigo ran up to the door and braced himself. Slowly he grabbed the door handle and opened the door. Renji was standing in the middle of the room, arms crossed, head down, thumbnail in his mouth being chewed on.

Ichigo walked in and closed the door. Looking at the wall behind Renji he whispered, "It was about me?"

Renji looked up at him hearing how his voice was void of emotion. Pulling his thumb from his mouth he quickly started to try and explain himself. "Ichigo, I'm sorry! I didn't want to ruin our friendship but everyone talked me into doing this and you did too! That's why Rukia dumped me, she figured it out! And the other night when I was joking about being gay for a year and being in love with you was completely true-"

"You love me?" Ichigo was ignored.

"I tried to find a way to tell you and this was the best way! I thought you might like me cause when you were describing the one for you it sounded like you were describing me and I hoped it was me you loved and-"

Ichigo walked up to Renji and put his hand over his mouth. "Renji, you need to stop rambling, ok?" Renji nodded, his eyes watery like he was about to cry at the first sign of rejection. Ichigo pulled his hand away. "You love me?"

Looking down at the floor Renji nodded.

"That song, the special person, the moment you wanted to be perfect, all me?"

He nodded again.

"Renji, look at me. Look at me." Hesitantly he did. Ichigo saw a few tears had slipped free. "I have one more question." Reaching up he wiped the tears away and grabbed Renji's face before whispering, "What made you think you meant nothing to me, that I don't love you too?"

Renji gasped as Ichigo pulled him down into a gentle kiss.

* * *

A/N: Whatcha think? I had soo much fun writing this. It only took me about an hour, maybe half an hour. Somewhere between then. Anyway, please review! If it will make you review I'll give you something to look forward to: We are going to see much more of Luppi.

There! Now Review! Please. Ja ne!


	4. Chapter 4

Ichigo rushed out of Renji's home, ignoring the yells and pleas of the redhead to stop and talk. Cursing himself for last night he fumbled with his keys trying to find the right one for his car. Last night was a mistake, he wished it hadn't happened. Well not yet at least.

* * *

It took Renji a second to respond but he was soon kissing Ichigo back. Soon their tongues were battling for dominance as their pent up love was released. Ichigo's arms wrapped tightly around Renji's shoulders as Renji's gripped his hips. Not able to keep them still he slipped his hands under Ichigo's shirt, rubbing the smooth skin of his lower back. Ichigo moaned lightly at the feeling. Shouting from the other side of the door reminded him the were still in the club. Reluctantly he broke the kiss, chuckling when Renji whined.

"How about we take this to your house?" he whispered hotly in Renji's ear. When he got a nod in return he licked the shell of his ear, smirking when he heard a small moan, and pulled Renji out the back of the club where his car was waiting for them.

As they were going down the road Ichigo would sneak glances of Renji. It took everything he had not to jump him then and there. The read head was still flushed and breathing a bit heavy. Seeing the noticeable bump in Renji's pants and knowing he put it there wasn't helping at all with his own problem.

After what seemed like forever they finally reached the redhead's house and rushed inside. As soon as the door was closed Ichigo was pushed up against it with his arms pinned and legs wrapped around Renji's waist, pushing their erections together. Moans were emanating from both of them. Unable to stand the clothed friction and touches Ichigo untangled himself from Renji and pulled him up the stairs to the bedroom. Renji, who gladly followed, found himself lying on his back with an aroused Ichigo straddling him, lustful eyes staring into his own. Ichigo's tanned hands reached down and pulled off their shirts. Unable to just lay back Renji flipped their positions and attacked Ichigo's neck with licks, bites, and open-mouthed kisses. Making his way down the enticing chest Renji stopped only to pay attention to his nipples. The moans and whimpers the left Ichigo's mouth went straight to Renji's already hardened cock.

Sitting up on his knees he stared down at the sight before him. Ichigo stared up at him with dark, half-lidded brown eyes, a dark blush covering his face and chest, kiss-swollen lips parted, panting. His hands gripping the comforter beneath him and legs spread wide open for him. Renji almost came then and there. Capturing Ichigo's lips in another kiss he began to palm the hardness in his pants. Moaning, Ichigo bucked his hips against his hand and gasped against his lips, "More."

Breaking the kiss he complied and finished undressing both of them. Crawling back on top of him they paused to admire the others body. Ichigo couldn't help but to lean up and lick every tattoo that covered Renji's torso. Renji slid his hand into the spiky orange hair and gripped it while his head rolled back.

Pushing Ichigo back on the bed he started to make another trial of kisses and bites down the lithe, tan body. Soon he got to Ichigo's pale orange happy trial. Almost hesitantly he started to kiss around the straining member. He was clueless about what to do next. He never done this with a guy before. Thinking of what he wanted his girlfriends to do to him he slowly stuck his tongue out and licked the tip. Hearing Ichigo's breath hitch he took the head in his mouth and sucked. He felt Ichigo's hands grip his hair tightly. Gaining courage he took more into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and sucking harder. Looking up he saw Ichigo's back arched, his chest heaving with his ragged breathing. Renji moaned at the site, sending vibrations around the cock in his mouth making Ichigo come closer to the edge.

Feeling Ichigo about to release he pulled back, ignoring the whines from Ichigo. Smirking he leaned down and whispered in his ear, "Don't worry Ichi, there's more to come."

Ichigo moaned and closed his eyes in anticipation. When nothing came he opened his eyes to see Renji staring at the pillow beside his head, chewing on his bottom lip.

"Renji?"

"I… I don't know what to do Ichi," Renji admitted shyly.

Understanding, Ichigo gave him a warm smile and took his hand. Keeping eye contact, he took three of his fingers into his mouth and sucked on them. He made sure each was coated with saliva before releasing them. He directed the hand down to his ass and whispered, "Start with one."

Nodding, Renji nervously pressed against Ichigo's entrance then pushed past the ring of muscle. Ichigo tensed slightly at the initial discomfort. Renji pushed it in and out before adding another. Pausing when Ichigo winced he started a scissoring motion. Soon Renji had all three in and Ichigo was bucking against them moaning. Figuring he had stretched him enough he pulled his fingers out and pressed himself against the hole. Ichigo could feel Renji shaking slightly and knew he was still hesitant. Deciding to help him out he flipped a stunned Renji on his back and straddled him.

Looking up at a smirking Ichigo, Renji watched as Ichigo lowered himself on his weeping cock. He moaned as a wet, tight heat surrounded him. Once Ichigo was fully seated on him he paused, allowing himself to get used to being completely stretched. When the initial pain subsided he lifted himself up and dropped himself back down. They both moaned at the sensation. Starting a slow speed that gradually picked up Ichigo dug his nails into Renji's shoulders. Gaining that courage back Renji flipped them over again. Snapping his hips forward he thrust harder and deeper into Ichigo. Suddenly Ichigo screamed in pleasure.

"Oh god, R-Renji, right ah, there," Ichigo moaned. Grunting in response, Renji angled his thrusts so he was striking Ichigo's prostate repeatedly. Arching his back, Ichigo wrapped his legs around Renji and clawed at his back.

"Renji! Ah, I'm so, ngh, so close," Ichigo moaned.

Grabbing Ichigo's erection, Renji picked up speed and stroked Ichigo in time with his thrusts. Feeling Ichigo's release building he whispered huskily in Ichigo's ear, "That's it Ichi, come for me baby."

That sent Ichigo over the edge. Screaming he released into Renji's hand. With Ichigo's walls clenching tightly around him Renji only got in a few more thrusts before coming in him.

Panting he pulled out and collapsed beside Ichigo. Ichigo turned and cuddled into Renji's side, feeling Renji's arms wrap around him.

"That was…amazing," Renji said once his breath evened out.

Smiling up at him, Ichigo leaned up and kissed him sweetly. "I love you," he whispered when he laid back.

"I love you too," Renji replied before they both fell asleep with smiles on their faces.

~* FEW HOURS LATER*~

Ichigo stirred as the morning sun shined in his face. Groaning he turned over and curled into the warm body beside him.

'Wait, what?' Ichigo thought as his eyes snapped open. Seeing it was Renji he relaxed. Memories of last night flooded his mind as he smiled and ran his hand through the long red hair splayed on the pillow. Still running his hands through Renji's hair he studied the sleeping face. Or what he thought was sleeping. A smile spread across Renji's face as he muttered, "Ya know, it's hard to sleep when you do that."

"Sorry," Ichigo said pulling his hand back.

"Don't be," Renji told him, opening his eyes, "It felt good."

Ichigo smiled and kissed him. "Morning.

Renji stretched and mumbled, "Morning."

Chuckling Ichigo got up and put his clothes back on. He turned around and saw Renji was on the verge of falling back asleep. Renji was never a morning person. Chuckling he crawled back onto the bed and put his hand on Renji's chest shaking him. "Come on sleepy head, time to get up."

"I don't wanna," Renji muttered before turning onto his side. Rolling his eyes Ichigo was about to tell him to get up again when a plan formed in his head. With an evil smile Ichigo pushed him onto his back and got on all fours above him. Renji stared at him with sleepy eyes. Thinking of how cute Renji was when he's tired he leaned down and kissed him. He pried his mouth open and sucked on Renji's tongue. Renji moaned and reached up to squeeze his still sore ass. Knowing he was more than awake, Ichigo broke the kiss and nipped at his earlobe. "Come on, I'll make you breakfast."

Getting up he tugged on Renji's hand.

"That was unfair Ichi," Renji groaned as he pulled on a pair of sweat pants.

"It got you up didn't it," Ichigo replied with a grin before going into the kitchen. A minute later a yawning redhead came in and accepted the coffee handed to him. Leaning against the counter he gulped down some of the hot caffeine. He watched as Ichigo pulled eggs and bacon out of the fridge before placing slices on the frying pan and cracking a few eggs.

"I still can't figure out how you can be so energized at this time in the morning. It aint natural," Renji told him as he drank more of his coffee.

Ichigo smiled at him. "Coming from the guy who can sleep like a hibernating bear."

Renji shrugged. Putting down his mug he wrapped his arms around Ichigo's waist and placed his head on his shoulder. Ichigo continued to scramble the eggs and flip the bacon as if he wasn't there but was smiling.

Soon he was done and placed a plate in front of a stool by the counter. Renji released him before sitting down and eating the food.

Suddenly the chorus of Grenade by Bruno Mars played. Pulling out his phone Ichigo groaned.

"What?" Renji asked.

"That doctors appointment is today," Ichigo answered. Renji nodded. He watched as Ichigo pressed a series of buttons on his phone before he froze. He had the look of someone who just made the hugest mistake on his face.

"Ichi?" Renji said worried at what could upset him. When Ichigo didn't answer he walked over to him and pulled his phone from his hands. Displayed on the screen was a text from Shuuhei saying he was going to hang out with Izuru and would call him later. Confused as to why this would make Ichigo react the way he did he turned back to the orange haired teen. "What's wrong Ichigo?"

Something seemed to snap in Ichigo. "What's wrong? What's wrong? What's wrong is I cheated on your cousin last night!"

Understanding Renji sighed. "Ichigo-"

"I got to go," Ichigo cut him off. He grabbed his phone and walked out of the house with Renji following him.

* * *

How could he have been so stupid? Finally getting the right key he was about to unlock the door when he was suddenly spun around. He came face to face with Renji.

"Ichigo hold on."

"No Renji, I got to go. Now!"

"Can we talk first?"

"Talk? Talk about what? How I just cheated on your cousin and you don't even seem to care? Damn it Renji last night shouldn't have happened!"

He was shocked when Renji shoved him against his car and pinned him there.

"Don't say that," Renji almost begged.

"It's true," Ichigo whispered.

"How? I love you and you love me! What's so wrong about it?"

Ichigo glared up at him, "I'm in a relationship with Shuuhei!"

"Screw Shuuhei!" Renji shouted. "The fucker was probably cheating on you last night anyway!"

"Hey! Shut the hell up!" one of Renji's neighbors shouted. Renji flipped him off but lowered his voice anyway.

"Please Ichigo, don't act as if last night was a mistake. Please," Renji whispered.

Ichigo looked away before whispering, "I'm sorry Renji. But it was."

He cringed as Renji hit his car and spat, "Whatever." He watched as Renji stormed into his house and slammed his door. With tears slipping down his face he got in his car and drove away.

Driving over the speed limit he went into town. Pulling out his phone he called Shuuhei's cell but it went straight to voice mail. Hanging up he called Izuru's. He had to talk to his boyfriend now!

He heard the sound of the phone being answered. "Izuru! I need to talk to Shuuhei-"

"_Shuuhei, q-quit it_," he heard Izuru moan. His eyes widened at what he was hearing. Renji was right.

"_Why baby? You know you like it_."

Pissed Ichigo was about to shout into the phone when another one of his headaches appeared. Dropping his phone and releasing the steering wheel he grabbed onto his head and leaned forward. He didn't see the red light he ran, didn't hear the car honks and shouts, didn't see the eighteen wheeler, didn't even feel the pain.

* * *

Tatsuki, Chad, and Orihime were having lunch in a small café when the heard a loud crash and the squeal of tires. Looking out the window the saw a car being rammed and flipping over a few times from the impact before resting once again on it's wheels. They winced at the damage and felt sympathy when Orihime suddenly screamed. Turning to her they saw she was crying with her hand over her mouth. When she started shouting they knew why. "That's Ichigo!"

With wide eyes and fear in their stomachs they ran out of the café and to the smashed car. Looking into the shattered windows they saw it was indeed their orange haired friend. Tatsuki pulled at the car door but it wouldn't budge. "Chad!" she screamed.

Her large friend grabbed the door and used all his strength to finally get it open. Reaching in he grabbed onto Ichigo and pulled him out before placing him on the road. Blood covered him and shards of glass stuck in him as if he were a pin cushion.

"Ichigo!" Tatsuki screamed seeing how bad he was hurt. His breathing was ragged and too fast. Pulling out her phone she shoved into Orihime's hands demanding the girl to call 911. Taking off her jacket she pressed it to the large gash on Ichigo's head trying to stop the bleeding.

"R-Renji," Ichigo gasped, his eyes still screwed shut. "I'm s-sorry. S-so s-sorry."

"Ichigo shut up!" Tatsuki screamed at him. "Damn it where's the ambulance?"

"T-they said they w-will b-be here s-soon," Orihime stuttered still crying.

Tears slipped down Tatsuki's face as she stared down at Ichigo. He was always like a brother to her, ever since they took fighting classes together when they were kids. Seeing the usually strong teen so weak and broken ripped through her heart.

After what seemed like forever Tatsuki heard the sirens of an ambulance. Medics ran up beside her and put Ichigo on a gurney, heading back to the ambulance. "Wait!" she screamed before turning to Chad and Orihime. "Orihime, go tell Ichigo's family what happened. Chad, go get Renji. They will want to be there." And with that they ran to do as she said as she got into the ambulance.

* * *

Orihime drove to the Kurasaki Clinic and parked outside. Running in she didn't bother with knocking.

Isshin and the twins ran up to her wondering why she was crying. Explaining through her tears she explained what had happened, crying even more when she saw the horrified expressions and tears gathering in their eyes. Scrambling to grab his keys Isshin ran to his car and drove off quickly. The twins got into Orihime's car as she sped down the road to the hospital.

* * *

Chad had gone to Renji's house and banged on his door till hi hand hurt. Knowing he wasn't home he jumped back into his truck and dialed the redhead's number.

* * *

"Damn it," Renji cursed under his breath, kicking at a rock on the sidewalk. After Ichigo left Renji had calmed down and realized how big of an idiot he was.

Ichigo was the kind of guy who put everyone before himself, doing what he could to have everyone happy. Of course he would feel quilty of cheating even if it was with someone he loved. That's just how he is. And that's one of the reasons Renji loved him. His selflessness. It was one of his best qualities and one of his worst, it sometimes got him to do reckless things.

Feeling his back pocket vibrating he pulled out his phone and saw it was Chad. Sighing he answered, "Hey man."

"_Where the hell are you_?" he heard Chad practically growl.

Startled by the angered attitude of his usually quiet and kind friend he stuttered, "W-wha…? Chad, What's wrong?"

"_Where are you_?" Chad shouted this time.

Figuring he better answer he said, "I'm walking to the club to get my car. I'm in front of the old movie theater."

"_I'll be right there. Don't move." _

Staring at his phone confused when Chad hung up he stopped. Chad never got mad or pissed like that. Deciding to do as he was told he leaned against the brick wall behind him. Whatever made Chad like that most have been huge.

Soon, he saw Chad's black F150 speed up the rode and stop in front of him. "Get in."

Blinking, he did as told. Once his door was closed they were speeding down the rode.

"Chad, what's going on?" Renji asked him.

"There was an accident," was all he said.

"Accident?"

"Ichigo's car got hit by an eighteen wheeler."

Hearing this Renji's heart stop. 'No, not Ichigo.'

"I-is he ok?"

Chad looked at him from the corner of his eye. "He was really hurt."

Renji did everything he could to not start crying. Ichigo, his Ichigo was hurt, possibly dying.

The ride to the hospital was silent. When they finally got there they ran into the ER waiting room where Tatsuki, Orihime, and Ichigo's family was waiting.

Renji gave her a questioning look. "Is he ok?"

Shaking her head she answered. "We don't know. He's in surgery. His heart had stopped twice on the way here." More tears slid down her face.

Renji was frozen in place. Pain was all he felt as he waited for the doctor to come out with the others.

* * *

A/N: I'm evil. Just plain evil. Oh and sorry it's shorter than the other chapters. I just wanted to leave ya'll wanting more. Did I succeed?


	5. Chapter 5

Renji and the others waited for hours for the doctor to come out and tell them if Ichigo survived. Many times Tatsuki and Chad tried to get him to eat but he always refused. He couldn't put his energy and focus into something so trivial. Not while Ichigo was hurt. Placing his head in his hands he choked back a sob.

A hand was placed on his back. Looking up he saw Isshin sitting beside him. Tears were in his eyes yet he was smiling. A smile so similar to Ichigo's. Unable to hold himself up anymore he collapsed against the older man and cried his heart's pain out. Isshin let him, rubbing his back he listened to the broken teen.

"I'm such an idiot. This is all my fault, I'm sorry," Renji cried. "I let him leave. I practically shoved him in his car myself!"

"Hey, don't talk like that. If I know anything about Ichigo at all it's that one: you can't make him do a thing. He's too stubborn to listen. And two: he wouldn't want you crying over him. He's a strong boy and a survivor. If anyone can come out of this alive it's him. You just have to believe in him. That's where he gets his strength. Our love and support. That's all we can do for now." Isshin's words rang true in Renji's ears. Ichigo was stronger than this. Isshin knew it, he knew it, hell everyone knew it. They all looked determined; like Ichigo usually does.

Renji felt some of the tension and worry drain from his mind and muscle. There was still a fair amount knowing at his very soul. He was about to reply when the doors to the ER waiting room burst open. The two who ran in lit a fire that burned Renji's blood, a fire that only grew when he saw the love marks poking out from under their shirts.

Without realizing it Renji walked up to Shuuhei glaring, and growled. "What are you doing here?"

Taken by surprise by Renji's attitude Shuuhei's eyes widened. "Chad called and told us what happened. We got here as soon as we could. How is he?"

"Why do you care? Wouldn't you rather go back with Izuru to his house and fool around some more?"

Guilt covered their faces. Tatsuki who had heard Renji stormed up to them. "You two were doing what?" she screamed in Shuuhei's face. The others were now listening in on the conversation. Even a nurse and security guard were listening.

"We-"

"What exactly were you two doing when Ichigo was almost killed? Fucking? 69 position? Feeling each other up? He's your boyfriend for god's sake! If you wanted to be with Izuru you should have been a man and told Ichigo! Not go behind his back and sleep with someone else! What the hell is wrong with you? You're just as bad Izuru!"

"Leave him out of this," Shuuhei warned Renji.

"Why? He's just as pathetic as you. He knew you were with Ichigo. But he still spread his legs for you didn't he? You two are a waste of space and time," Renji told them. He was about to walk away when Shuuhei started saying things that made his blood almost burst through his veins.

"What about you? Why don't you be a man? I know you're in love with him. But you haven't said anything. You're too scared," Shuuhei said with a smug smirk that pushed Renji over the edge.

"You don't know shit! I told him last night! And guess what! He loves me too." Renji knew he said the wrong thing when Shuuhei's smirk didn't disappear but instead grew.

"Oh really?" Shuuhei purred like he just learned the world's largest secret. "And what exactly happened after this confession?" Renji's silence was answer enough. "You're lecturing us when you two have done the same thing. Looks like we are the same, _cousin_. Besides, I didn't know that three little words was all it would take for him to spread his legs. Huh. And you said I was pathetic."

The next second went by in a blur. All Renji knew was that he was on top of Shuuhei, punches raining down on his face and torso. Blood splattered around them. Renji felt like he couldn't stop. And he didn't want to. He could let go whatever Shuuhei said about him. But he crossed a line. He insulted his Ichigo. Suddenly two strong pairs of arms pulled him off of the beaten and bloody teen.

He looked over his shoulder to see Isshin and the bodyguard, Tessai, holding him back. Even though their grip was strong he knew they would love to let him go. He could see it in their eyes.

"I'm ok guys," he panted. They looked at him, concern and worry evident on their faces. "I'm ok," he repeated and felt their hold loosen. He looked down at his cousin who was glaring up at him. With a completely blank face he held his hand out for him to take. Shuuhei made the mistake of accepting it. As soon as he was standing, Renji tightened his grip on his hand. "Stay the hell away from Ichigo," he said calmly before punching him in the jaw once more. He took joy in the sight of him falling back on his ass.

Renji turned back to the others and smiled. "Now I feel better."

Tatsuki and the others were grinning and chuckling at him. The tension in the room lightened. Everyone started to relax some when the doctor came in.

The usually cheery and weird Urahara was serious and grim. Renji felt his heart drop at the sight.

"Urahara?" Isshin questioned.

Urahara sighed. "He'll be ok."

Everyone let out a audible sigh of relief. The words were small but held strong meaning.

Renji was still shaky as he asked, "Can we see him?"

Urahara shook his head sadly. "He's resting right now. Once he's out of recovery you can."

Isshin walked up to him, "Kisuke, can you tell us the extent of his injuries?"

Nodding, Urahara started to list them off. "He has many lacerations and bruises, one of his arms is broken, both ankles are twisted, three ribs are broken, two are cracked, and beneath one gash on his head is a crack in his skull."

Renji paled once more at the amount of injuries. Ichigo was that hurt and survived?

Isshin eyed Urahara suspiciously. "What are you not telling us?"

Kisuke sighed. "It's not what I'm not telling you, it's what I haven't told you yet."

"Well spit it out!" Tatsuki snapped.

He sighed again. "Has Ichigo been having headaches, fatigue, or memory problems?"

Shuuhei was about to say something but was cut off by Renji. "Yeah, he's been like that for a while. Why?"

"Well, why we were operating we noticed a fluid build up in his brain which causes seizures. Headaches, fatigue, and memory problems are a few symptoms."

"You mean…?" Renji's words trailed off.

"If we didn't notice the build up he would have had a seizure."

"Oh my god," Orihime muttered placing a hand over her mouth.

"But he's fine now, right?"

"Yes, we will just have to keep an eye on him and make sure it doesn't build up again. But there is one more thing."

Everyone was silent as they waited for him to finish.

"He slipped into a coma."

* * *

Three months had passed since Ichigo's accident. The orange haired teen was still stuck in a coma with no signs of waking. Every day friends and family stayed with him in his room, he was never alone. 99% of the time it was Renji who stayed with him. Renji would stay by his side and talk to him, sing some new lyrics, or read some of Ichigo's favorite books, mostly Shakespeare. It may have looked stupid but it kept Renji sane and he figured Ichigo could hear him. At least he hoped he did.

Today Ichigo's family was going to visit him so Renji decided to stay home, give the family some alone time. Unfortunately his plan to stay home and do nothing was ruined when some persistant knocking interrupted his process of becoming a couch potato.

Knock knock knock!

"Ugh, I'm coming," he grunted as he got up.

Knock knock knock!

"I said I'm coming!" he shouted.

Already annoyed he yanked the door open to see Nel standing there mid-knock with the rest of the band behind her.

His attitude shot from annoyed to irritated. Renji growled as they simple walked past him and made themselves at home in his living room. He glared at them from the doorway.

"Hey Renji," Nel chirped with a cheery smile.

Glare.

"What do you want?" he seethed.

Nel dropped her smile and gave him a concerned look. "You've been in a rut ever since the accident. You're not eating like you should and the only time you leave is to go to the hospital. This isn't good for you. Come on, do you think this is what Ichigo would want for you?"

Renji was silent as he considered her words. He knew she was right. He had got so much skinnier and lost a large percentage of his muscles and was now pale from lack of sunlight. Ichigo would be saddened to know that Renji was letting himself waste away. Just the thought of the orange-haired, comatose teen brought a sting to his eyes and an ache in his chest.

"I…I…" Renji couldn't speak since a lump now formed in his throat and made it hard to breathe. He crossed his arms and bowed his head as a few tears slipped free.

A sad smile marred Nel's face as she went up to the red head and hugged him. The fact that she could feel the side and back of his ribs so easily scared her. "Renji, you need to be more optimistic, he'll be fine. And when he wakes up he will be crushed that you let this happen. So, come with us to the club tonight. Ukitake asked as to perform."

Renji was silent for a few minutes before saying, "Do I have a choice?"

Smiling Nel raised an eyebrow, "Do you really have to ask?"

"Oh what was I thinking?" Renji sighed dramatically. "I'm gonna go take a shower."

He walked up the stairs to the shower and to get ready.

"I hope you guys know I'm gonna get piss ass drunk after we play!"

The band just laughed, glad to see some of the old Renji back.

* * *

_I see you standing here_

_But you're so far away_

_Starving for your attention_

_You don't even know my name_

_You're going through so much_

_But I know that I could be the one to hold you_

_Every single day_

_I find it hard to say_

_I could be yours alone_

_You will see someday_

_That all along the way_

_I was yours to hold_

_I was yours to hold_

_I see you walking by_

_Your hair always hiding your face_

_I wonder why you've been hurting_

_I wish I had some way to say_

_You're going through so much_

_Don't you know that I could be the one to hold you_

_I'm stretching but you're just out of reach_

_You should know_

_I'm ready when you're ready for me_

_And I'm waiting for the right time_

_For the day I catch your eye_

_To let you know_

_That I'm yours to hold_

_I'm stretching but you're just out of reach_

_I'm ready when you're ready for me _

"Alright, that's it for tonight. We'll be back some other time. See ya!" Renji shouted as they ignored the yells of disappointment and walked off stage with smiles on their faces.

"That was great Renji, you did a good job," Toshiro commented as they sat down at the bar.

"Thanks short-stack," Renji smirked.

Normally Toshiro would have scowled but since Renji was finally acting like himself for the first time in two months.

"Hey Renji, we are going to myself for a few drinks. Wanna come?" Isane asked.

He shook his head. "No thanks. I'm gonna stay here."

A few minutes after whining and begging from Nel they finally left without red head.

Renji sighed and ordered a few beers. After his fifth he noticed someone slightly familiar sit beside him.

"Hi," the feminine man said.

"Hey," Renji slurred. He usually wasn't a lightweight drinker but its been a while since he's had a drink.

"You don't remember me do you?"

Renji squinted his eyes but ended up shaking his head. "Nope."

"I was here when you guys first played. My name is Luppi," he told him.

"Oh yeah, you hit on me." That night felt like ages ago.

"And I will again," Luppi said trying to give him a seductive look.

"Hey, sorry to burst your bubble-well actually not really, but I have a boyfriend."

Luppi looked shocked, then pouted, then smirked. "Oh really, then where is he?"

Glaring Renji growled, "The hospital in a coma."

Luppi gasped. "Oh my god, I am so sorry. I had no clue."

"Obviously."

Looking down Luppi fiddled with his shirt before looking back up and asking, "How did it happen?"

Renji blinked before sighing. Taking a sip of his beer he began to explain about the fight, the car crash, and the fight at the hospital. By the time he finished he had finished his beer and started another. Wavering slightly in his seat he rubbed his eyes to clear the buzzed haze. Luppi took note of this before 'innocently' suggesting he would help the redhead get home.

Too buzzed to care Renji nodded and slid out of his seat, accepting the arm Luppi offered. Somehow he was able to lead them towards his home and unlocked the door. Turning to the small brunette he opened his mouth to tell him he could leave when said brunette latched his mouth onto Renji's neck. Renji was about to shove him away and tell him to fuck off, the brunette turned into a scowling orange haired teen. Groaning he picked him, slammed him into the wall, and kissed him.

* * *

In a small hospital room, filled only with the sounds of a heart monitor and snoring, a grown man slept in a plastic chair next to a bed where a young teen slept. Finally stirring after a three month sleep, the orangette's eyes fluttered open. Immediately his mind conjured up an image of a red haired male covered in tribal tattoos.

"Renji," he muttered, wondering why his heart ached painfully and tears streamed down his face.

* * *

**A/N: **I'm sorry I took so long to update! Please don't kill! And I'm also sorry for making Shuuhei such an ass, he's actually one of my favorite characters. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter, I will definitely try to update soon now that Ichigo has woke up. But I'm not sure if I can since school started again. I'm finally a junior! Yay!

Ja ne!


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